Wet Dreams- Jessie Spano Edition (Elizabeth Berkley)

I know that Jessie Spano was just a character on a TV show… I know that she wouldn’t let any ol’ misogynistic comment slide… I know that she was at times too serious… But I appreciated those things about her.

Jessie just wanted a guy with a mind and some manners. I remember realizing that when I was younger. I also realized that little ol’ female me could do nothing for her but that didn’t stop me from wanting to.

I’ve always had a thing for tall, leggy women so Jessie was absolutely perfect for me. I always imagined making out with her. I could see her putting the same passion that she put into feminist subjects into her kisses.

The idea of making out with Jessie still makes me wet. I want to end up with my head between her legs, with her juices all over my mouth, her above me moaning And saying:

I’m so excited!!

I’m soooo excited!

Only difference is, she won’t cry after she says that… She’ll just cum like crazy while her clit pulsates on my tongue…

Wet Dreams- Anne Hathaway Edition

I didn’t pay much attention to Anne Hathaway until I saw her in The Dark Knight Rises.

It’s not that I didn’t see that she was a cute girl. It’s not that I didn’t notice those big ol’ juicy lips. It’s probably because she wasn’t wearing leather.

I never was much of a leather lover. I leave it for Sisqo and other people like him who wear it well. When I saw Anne Hathaway in her Catsuit… I lost it a little bit. She had these bright lips and her outfit was so snug.. And not snug like “Go and get a size up” but snug like “I wish I were your pants because I wanna be close to that ass”.

Anne Hathaway always looked rather unassuming and cute and that leather made her look like a complete bad girl. I doubt that I could ever see her as the good girl next door type after The Dark Knight. It’s too late for that. I’ve had too many dirty thoughts.

I’ve dreamt of her being a dominatrix and her ordering me around to do silly things, like bark like a dog or make elephant noises. I would happily do it because it would make her happy. I’ve imagined myself making a sound she doesn’t like and her taking her whip and having me make the get on all fours to practice.

Mistress Anne: Bark like a dog.

Me: Woof woof woof

WHAP!! That whip hurts more than I thought it would…

Mistress Anne: Bark like a big dog! You sound like a chuhuahua, and I don’t like chihuahuas!

Me: WOOOF WOOOOF WOOOOOF

WHAP!!! Holy shit…. My asscheeks are going to be red…

Mistress Anne: I don’t like rottweilers. Don’t bark like a rottweiler. Bark like a yellow lab.

Me: arrrff arrf arrf?

WHAP!!  WHAP!!

WHAP!!

Mistress Anne: Move your hand! You will take the punishment for not doing as asked!!

I can totally see her just humiliating me in that manner, playing mind games and making me feel stupid… and at the end of it all, it will be totally worth it. Perhaps she’ll reward me by letting me taste her smooth, sweet pussy… Perhaps she’ll make me sit at the edge of the bed while she plays with herself and I will be given the pleasure of her allowing me to use my face as something she wants to squirt on… If I’m lucky she’ll let me lick her ass while she’s on all fours, fucking her pussy with a dildo…

Oh, Mistress Anne…

Wet Dreams: Alyssa Milano

I wasn’t familiar with Alyssa Milano until she played Reese Witherspoon’s best friend in Fear. Mark Wahlberg was the crazy boyfriend who couldn’t get enough of Reese but who cared about Reese when you have hot looking Alyssa Milano nearby? Her dark hair and sneaky little smile drives me nuts. Masturbation material, yeah?

I bought the dvd a while back just to see her in a bikini whenever I wanted. Let’s not forget that part where that big dude grabbed her ass when he flung her over his shoulder. That was legit my favorite part of the movie. Her ass looked so soft and smooth, I just wanted to bite it.

Wet Dreams- Nia Long Edition

Her smile… Her presence… That sexy little body..

Why wouldn’t you love Nia Long?

She’s been on tv for a very long time. I remember seeing her on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, back when she had a short hair cut. Fast forward a few years and Mekhi Phifer was beating it up on the kitchen sink in Soul Food. I can watch that scene every damn day.. What amazes me is that Nia Long doesn’t need to be naked to exude such sex appeal.

My imaginary ding dong loves Nia Long. My magical dingaling senses tell me that she loves having her pussy eaten. I imagine her having the smoothest, bump-free kitty ever. I can also imagine her kitty smelling like apricots. (Sorry, Peach lovers, Peach kitties are far too common)
I’d love to have Nia Long’s Kitty in my face, with those smooth brown legs wrapped around me, smothering me further into her.

How many of you are with me?

Wet Dreams- Lena Dunham Edition

Lena Dunham, the star of Girls, is compellingly awesome in my opinion. She is one of the few women I’ve seen in entertainment who is honest, possibly too honest for some people. She doesn’t seem like someone who sends the disclaimer of “TMI” when she’s about to share something heavy. I love that.

I hate the whole “tmi” thing. Why can’t we just be honest?

Anyway, I remember a scene in Girls where Hannah surprised Adam and wore this lingerie and I remember thinking “damn… she’s wearing that shit..”

Although there weren’t many who agreed with me, apparently because Lena isn’t stick-thin, I don’t give a shit. My imaginary ding dong loves Lena Dunham.

I imagine her being extremely honest in bed. She isn’t one of those dry-as-a-board kind of girls. I just hope that she wouldn’t talk too much and that she’d get into the moment.