Thank The Beautiful Lawn Mower

I got horny today.

It’s been months since anything turned me on. I’m not sure why but nothing was doing it for me. I haven’t bothered with writing on here because I can’t write about sex if I can’t think about sex. For a couple months now all I wanted to do was cook new dessert recipes and play with my pug.

Until today, that is!

I want to play with the guy who will be dropping by to mow the lawn twice a month. That’s two times a month I’ll find a reason to be on my front deck. I don’t care if it’s 98 degrees outside! You gotta see this guy, he’s beautiful!

Mr. Beautiful is white, at least 6 foot 2, has a toned body and a medium kind of build, think like Ryan Reynolds. He’s got a bald head and a full dark beard. He has these big green eyes, and long dark lashes to match.

I wish that I could sneak and take a picture of him and post it on here.

But uh, yeah…
I shouldn’t have shook his hand.

Well, out of being how I am I had to, as we were conducting business, but I shouldn’t have. Had I known that my pussy would wake right up at that point, I would not have done it.
He shook my hand very well. I don’t like floppy fish handshakes, I prefer strong confident ones. His hand was larger than mine and he shook my hand like he meant business. He had smooth yet gruff hands. I can just about imagine his hands holding my ass cheeks while I rode him… I can almost feel him fingering my pussy while I beg for him to untie me…

You ever look into someone’s eyes and just know that you two would have awesome sex?

Well, if you haven’t, you gotta try it. This feeling can bring you to some places.

I feel like I have to go and play with myself just so I can relax.


Masturbating…. while the house is full

Masturbating can be a task in itself for some people. Sometimes rubbing a good one out can take a while or your thoughts about the lawn or dishes or bills can completely override the freaky thoughts you need to get the job done.

But what about when your mind isn’t full but your house is?

I remember growing up in a house full of people and masturbating was completely off limits because either

A- you can’t do it in the room because someone is in there.
B- you can’t do it in the bathroom because someone has to take a shit.
C- someone has taken a shit in the bathroom and the soft, pleasant smell of fresh fecal action just doesn’t do it for you.
D- you need some motivation and your motivation might be too obvious. (Those porn mag pages can be rather noisy when you don’t want them to be or porn on tv can be hard to disguise if a small kid walks in on you)

As I get older and notice that my house never seems empty for whatever reason, I run into this problem. It seems this is more difficult for women because our minds typically strays quicker while some men seem like they can just shoot one off a wee bit more easily.

I would love to hear if this has happened to anyone besides me! I can’t possibly be the only poor orgasm-less soul out there!